So you think I would be happy. I had an uninterrupted sleep last night.... horray! The reason for this is that I spent my first night home alone. I hate the ends of relationships, I'm just so not good at them. I'm sappy and soppy and soft when it comes to being unyielding in what I believe to be the best decision.
Friends are being supportive and I was whisked away for pots parmas and dishes again last night. When I returned home all the things that don't belong to me were gone, the ute, the trailers, the tools, the dining table. Aside from that most things here are mine, but the ones that hit home the most were the littlest. The kids school photos are gone from the fridge, and this now adorns an empty room.....
Is it just me or does that seem a little odd to you too? Where does this go after the movie finishes? ' boy and girl swiftly realise there was a bloody good reason for breaking up in the first place and after nearly murdering one another go through a messy divorce'.
I have often wondered if with passing time and the changes they bring would old relationships of mine now work out happily ever after?
I have recently been in communicado with an old flame. After a very brief love affair I upped sticks and left the UK in hot pursuit of this relationship, landing in Chicago it lasted around a year and a half before collapsing into a miserable heap. At the time I was devastated, I once again pulled up roots and moved to Australia. And aren't I glad I did! After all that heartache that move was I think the best that I have ever made.
After years of infrequent emails I ended up to this chap on the phone recently, after all this time he still made me feel a wee bit funny inside, we laughed a lot and connected in just the same way I remembered. Had he lived closer than several thousands of miles away there would be a very strong temptation to hop back on that particular rollercoaster and 'just see' what would happen.
Since our time together ther have been a lot of changes, I have been married, built a life for myself in a different country and feel very, very different. Thankfuly there is an awful lot of ocean between he and I, lucky seeing as he is now a cheesy american 'Life Coach For Positive People!'.
The irony of that is not lost on me. But I am still looking forward to that next phone call.
Friends are being supportive and I was whisked away for pots parmas and dishes again last night. When I returned home all the things that don't belong to me were gone, the ute, the trailers, the tools, the dining table. Aside from that most things here are mine, but the ones that hit home the most were the littlest. The kids school photos are gone from the fridge, and this now adorns an empty room.....
My now ex Certain Someone and I crossed paths tonight whilst driving to our now respective homes, a driving salute passed between us and a little while later a text message followed "Don't forget to put the bins out". Mundane but signifcant.
Is it just me or does that seem a little odd to you too? Where does this go after the movie finishes? ' boy and girl swiftly realise there was a bloody good reason for breaking up in the first place and after nearly murdering one another go through a messy divorce'.
I have often wondered if with passing time and the changes they bring would old relationships of mine now work out happily ever after?
I have recently been in communicado with an old flame. After a very brief love affair I upped sticks and left the UK in hot pursuit of this relationship, landing in Chicago it lasted around a year and a half before collapsing into a miserable heap. At the time I was devastated, I once again pulled up roots and moved to Australia. And aren't I glad I did! After all that heartache that move was I think the best that I have ever made.
After years of infrequent emails I ended up to this chap on the phone recently, after all this time he still made me feel a wee bit funny inside, we laughed a lot and connected in just the same way I remembered. Had he lived closer than several thousands of miles away there would be a very strong temptation to hop back on that particular rollercoaster and 'just see' what would happen.
Since our time together ther have been a lot of changes, I have been married, built a life for myself in a different country and feel very, very different. Thankfuly there is an awful lot of ocean between he and I, lucky seeing as he is now a cheesy american 'Life Coach For Positive People!'.
The irony of that is not lost on me. But I am still looking forward to that next phone call.
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4 comments:
You make my heart bleed. I don't know what to say honey. Maybe when you take the bins out, lookup at the stars. Maybe that special future someone will be looking at the same stars at the same time. But most likely not, as thats a cheesy thought from a Hollywood story board. Well at least you'll remember to take the bins out. Digital hugs for ya.
Time will make things better and new horizons will help too! Hope you having lots of lovely chats & laughs with Mr Chicago..even if it's just for fun. Fun is good!! Lovely catching up today, xo
aww so sorry to hear about your bruised heart, but you know, spring is almost here and it's got to be the most exciting time of year - perrrfect for all kinds of new beginnings
oh bugger - oh well come to my house this Thursday night - I'll organize the wine!!! (you do know what i am talking about I hope)
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